Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Spring Cleaning in July

This morning I got up at 6:30 thanks to people who work in the Central timezone and are too lazy to look up the 425 area code and the PACIFIC timezone it lies within. Grrr. 

Let me start by saying how OCD I am if you don't already know.  I have to constantly stay busy.  Since I quit my job, this house has never been so lucky nor seen so much improvement since the day it was built, 5 years ago. I'm not saying that I DO ALL THE WORK, it's because I love to and if I didn't, I would go mad, more than I already am, and Huck would have to lock me in a round rubber room.  It kind of sounds peaceful in a sadistic kind of way, but nonetheless, I take on these improvement projects myself in between shuffling kids back and forth to camps, writing some scripts for a project, and many trips to the bathroom to pee because y'all, I have THE WORLDS SMALLEST BLADDER.

Anyway, I sat down at my computer this morning and this spot caught my eye.  It was between the "backspace" and the "home" keys on my computer. I couldn't wedge my pinkie in to get it and it started laughing at me.  I got up and went and got a q-tip. I picked off the backspace key and gasped! I RAN and got the 500 count box of q-tips, the saline solution, the electronic duster in a can, and tweezers.  I started picking off the keys one by one and each time was startled by what I found, after I huffed the remaining contents of the can of cleaner.

Cupcake crumbles (I can't believe I let any get beyond my mouth so it must have been one of the kids)
Enough hair to construct a wig
OMG is that BACON???
a small family of four
a rabbit
and 2 lbs of dirt which will work well in the garden

I never realized how disgusting my keyboard on my laptop was until I started prying off the keys one by one.  I was q-tipping in one instance and grabbing hair with my tweezers the next.  I was one dead hooker away from making Gil Grissom happy with my work.

My keyboard is all clean except my space bar keeps getting stuck.  I guess I'm going to have to get the Sheriff to get rid of the squatters that have relocated to one end of it. Oh, and Huck, we need more q-tips.

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