Razor's Edge

One day while Huck and I were in the shower, yes mom, we were showering together to conserve water and, oh yeah, I am 37 years old!, I heard this noise start up and it sounded similar to that of swarming bees.

Me: Why does it sound like bees in here?

Huck: It's my razor.

Me: Why does your razor sound like bees?

Huck: It vibrates.

Me: Your razor vibrates? Why does it vibrate? What's that supposed to accomplish? Won't you cut yourself?

Huck: *BIG SIGH* I don't know why it vibrates, probably just another marketing ploy by Gillette to sell more razors and jack up the price, but it works.

Me: Lame.

As he put it up on the rack hanging in the shower I just looked at it. It was daring me to use it and fall in love with it. Whatever. I am fine with my cheap 6-pack women's razors that come in a variety of pretty colors. Suck it, Gillette.

Many months have passed since that conversation and that damn razor has taunted me EVERY TIME I have stepped into that shower. I have used it multiple times on Huck and I just have to say...USE. YOUR. IMAGINATION. There's something romantic in shaving a man's.............

neck. ;)

The other day when I walked into our bathroom I noticed a AA battery lying on the counter. I immediately ran, not walked, to my special drawer by the bed to see if anything had been disturbed. Nope. Yay. Anyway, a couple of days later Huck said he was missing the battery he laid on the counter. (I had put it away in the drawer for future need.) His battery on his totally-awesome-cool razor needed it because it was dead. That's why that S.O.B. had not taunted me for a couple of days...it was dead.

It started chanting my name almost immediately after CPR was administered or whatever Huck had to do to revive it. I finally gave in one morning earlier this week and used it. This monstrosity of a razor has 5 freaking blades and one on the edge so it has 6 in all! Did I mention it vibrates? I don't know exactly why it does or what it's supposed to accomplish, but I really don't care because IT'S SOAWWESOME! My legs were in shavers heaven. I almost shaved my head just to see how well it managed. We became BFF's instantly and the affair had begun with Mr. Gillette Fusion. I tried to hide my secret from Huck as long as possible, but he quickly found out when he asked me if I had used his razor. Whatever do you mean, honey? No, he didn't find the razor by my side of the bed...I left it on in the shower. My secret is out, apparently I have to go buy my own now.